After Christmas

Everyone's least favorite time, sigh. Actually, the boo bears are having a ball, because they didn't really know it was Christmas anyway, and now they have all these great new toys to play with. The toy kitchen was a big hit, the parking garage was a big hit, the shopping cart was a big hit, the wooden train was a big hit, the doodler was a big hit, the broom and dustpan for heaven's sake were a big hit. From one aunt they received what I thought was an odd present: cubes with pictures of animals or vehicles on them that fit into a little tray, and when put together properly they make the sound of the animal or vehicle. Well, this was a HUGE hit and continues to be. They keep bringing me a tray with cubes on it, arranged incorrectly, and I have to fix it so it makes the sound of a fire engine or a pig or whatever. Another favorite is the wild turkey that was in Baby B's stocking. They keep bringing me the turkey so I'll squeeze it and it'll make its funny sound. I put it in the kitchen's little oven, but they didn't understand. Today it's riding around in the shopping cart.

But for those of us who DIDN'T get a lot of cool presents, after Christmas is kind of a dull time. I only got one small present this year and I have informed Rocket Boy that it was not a hit. He has a hard time with presents: I should give him more assistance.

The last couple of days I've been so miserably depressed that it's been hard to function. Shades of when we first moved to Ridgecrest. So yesterday RB surprised me by arranging for a babysitter and taking me out to dinner at Ridgecrest's version of a fancy French restaurant, Mon Reve.

I put on a dress, tights, and shoes with a bit of a heel. The babysitter arrived and off we went to downtown Ridgecrest, which is the most unlovely downtown that could be imagined. Plenty of street parking, since almost nothing is open in the evening. Our reservations were for 7:30 but we arrived at 6:30 and that was OK too, since only 2 other tables in the restaurant were occupied.

First impressions: paper placemats instead of a tablecloth, entrees all at least $18.95, and "seasoned fries" available as a side dish. Our waitress did not introduce herself or discuss specials or ask us what we wanted to drink, just left us with our menus and water glasses. It's been so long since I've been in a nice restaurant I don't even remember what's normal, but I don't think this is. On the plus side, the food was pretty good. We both had French onion soup (yummy), and a glass of delicious Riesling. RB had sole and I had an interesting chicken dish, also yummy. The cream for our decaf coffee was in those little plastic thimble-size containers. My creme brulee was just OK; RB enjoyed his chocolate volcano. Price with tip: $106. Hmm.

After dinner we walked up and down Balsam Street, attempting to look in shop windows, except that so many of them were vacant. Some tough teenagers were hanging out by the skateboard shop, smoking, but they didn't bother us. I suppose I should comment on how nice it was not to worry about getting mugged, but actually I was slightly worried. It's so empty downtown, and there is supposed to be quite a bit of meth in Ridgecrest. Ah well, nothing happened. We made it home safely.

And now onward into the new year. In six weeks we will celebrate our one-year anniversary in Ridgecrest. But probably not at Mon Reve.

Lights

We have put up our tree! This year it was so easy, it seemed like it was done almost before we started. Because of our little wanderers, we decided to assemble only half the tree (it's fake, obviously) and put it on top of the baby grand piano, out of their reach. Rocket Boy put it together and wound 2 strings of lights around it. Then I added a few dozen ornaments. And then we were done. Actually there is room for more ornaments, and I added a few more today and maybe I'll add a few more tomorrow. But it's also fine as is. No pressure.

I set up my creche beneath the tree. My nativity scene is such a mess. I have 5 wise men but only 1 camel. I have 7 sheep, a cow, and a llama, but no shepherds. Also no angels. The holy family are made of clay, and they are inside a round clay "stable" along with another cow, a donkey, and some dried greenery. Each year I think I must remedy this situation and at least get a shepherd or at least get an angel or at least get another camel. But I don't. Usually I just add more livestock. How is this going to make any sense to the babies, when they get older? We 5 kings of orient are. The livestock will turn feral and start knocking down the stable. And what about an angel. This year a Santa Claus ornament is hanging very close to the creche, looking like a fat red angel. I suppose he could play that part, but it seems confusing.

Well, what is there about Christmas that isn't confusing? It's Jesus's birthday, except that he was really born in the spring. Santa Claus brings toys to good little girls and boys but he isn't real, your parents were lying about that. It seems so much simpler just to celebrate the Winter Solstice, but then what about all that beautiful religious music? I think I went back and reclaimed Christianity for myself just so I could sing the carols without feeling like a fraud.

Carols are one of the best things about Christmas and one of the other best things is the lights. (Also on the list: peppermint ice cream, mint M&Ms, and all kinds of Christmas cookies. Also Christmas cards arriving in the mail, preferably enclosing long, detailed Christmas letters.) I just love walking or driving around looking at light displays. I DO NOT CARE how much energy it wastes. I DO NOT. I will conserve energy the rest of the year. It turns out that Ridgecrest is very big on light displays. Perhaps that could have been predicted (small town atmosphere, very very Christian). The local newspaper printed a map showing the locations of notable displays, but we found many more by just driving around. The babies thought it was great. We're not sure how much they can see from their carseats, but I guess it's enough. "Doe bi-tee!" Baby A exclaimed, which we finally translated as "So pretty!" And it was.

Christmas, continued

December is passing quickly, as it always does. The babies and I have 3 Advent calendars and most days I remember to open the windows. First we look at the real calendar and find the date, then we look for that date on the Advent calendars. Actually I believe the babies have not the foggiest idea what the connection is between the two types of calendars, but that's OK. When I say "We should open the next window on our Advent calendars," they get excited and run to the kitchen and point at the calendars. And they love watching me open the little windows.

The rest of Christmas is moving along, as it always does, even in Ridgecrest. I'm working on my cards, almost done with gifts. The toy kitchen arrived today, so that's going to be a project to put together. Other than that, we're just going to do stockings for the babies, since they'll get lots of presents from other family members. Haven't baked any cookies yet, haven't put up the tree.

This week at the babies' daycare we helped celebrate "Jesus' Birthday Party." That was quite something, involving a snow machine, a craft project that was totally inappropriate for small children, and pepperoni pizza (which none of the kids ate). I believe that my children have no idea who Jesus is, nor do they see any connection between his birthday party and all the glass ball ornaments hanging from the ceiling of their daycare room. (Nor do most people.) But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe they're absorbing all of this, making connections. At what point will they start turning into Republicans?

Just when I was really missing Boulder a lot, we got a call: a water pipe in our house burst due to the extremely cold weather they've been having. Also our furnace is out (that's why the pipe burst) and we may have to replace it. So I've been dealing with insurance adjusters and emergency clean-up people and plumbers. It's so hard to do from so far away. That's using up my energy -- nothing left for baking.

And of course, December is a sad month too. The days leading up to the winter solstice are so long and dark. The happy month is also the month to remember those who are gone: my mother, my father, all four grandparents, all my aunts and uncles on my mother's side, and my oldest sister. Also Rocket Boy's mother, father, grandparents, and all his aunts and uncles. It sometimes seems like there isn't anyone left alive, but then I remember that's what reproduction is for. Making more. And our two more are asleep in their beds, but tomorrow they will remind me again to smile and maybe even make Christmas cookies.

Darwin Falls

We were taking our walk this morning (all 4 of us, since it's Saturday) and Rocket Boy said, "Do you have anything planned for the weekend," and I said no, not really. He said, "Do you want to go anywhere?" I said sure, always. He said, "What about Darwin Falls?" I said OK, why not? So we went home, got ready, and headed for Death Valley.

It's funny, we waited all summer and fall for it to get cool enough to visit Death Valley. Now, in December, it seems to us like the perfect time to go, but apparently no one else thinks so. From Ridgecrest to Trona to Panamint Springs, there was NOBODY on the road. We cruised along. It was cool and a bit overcast. The desert has this wintry feeling to it, hard to describe because there's no obvious sign: no snow, no major shift in coloration. The desert plants haven't lost their leaves. Everything just has this sense of dormancy, different from the sense of dormancy that everything has in the summer. (When does this country wake up? Only in the spring?)

It took us just over an hour to drive 70 miles to Panamint Springs. We had lunch there; it was almost deserted. RB commented on this to the waitress and she said this is their slow season. What's the busy season, we asked, thinking probably spring. "Summer," she said. You're kidding, we said. No, she wasn't kidding. I remember reading that a lot of Europeans come in the summer, because they want to experience 120 degree heat.

The Darwin Falls trailhead is about 3.5 miles from Panamint Springs and we found it without too much trouble. For this hike we thought we'd carry the babies in backpacks. We hoisted them up on our backs and began walking. Unfortunately, either we got lost or the trail is not good at this time of year or the trail needs work. We soon found ourselves wading through a fairly deep stream with very cold water. Of course I was wearing my Nikes. Then we had to cross the stream again. Then again. Then we were going to have to scramble up some rocks. If we hadn't had the babies, we probably would have gone on, but we did have the babies. I could just see myself falling off a rock into the stream and dumping Baby A out of the pack on his head. So we went back without ever seeing the Falls.

To go home, we headed west to Olancha (and then south on 395 back to Ridgecrest). The drive to Olancha was almost spooky. Such barren countryside and almost no one else on the road. It's all so gorgeous, in this weird, deserty sort of way. I am really getting to like the desert (but unfortunately not, as RB said, the people who live there). The dark, towering, snow-topped southern Sierra Nevada mountain peaks loomed ahead of us. When we got to Olancha the sign said the population is 39. RB was hoping for a restaurant, but there was nothing. We went home and had scrambled eggs.

December already

Yes, it's December in Ridgecrest. It's gotten much colder, into the 20s at night, the 60s during the day. It even rained once, lightly. The roses are still blooming, but the black widow spiders seem to have all died, due to the cold nights. But they've probably left bulging egg sacks hidden here and there around the perimeter of the house. There's a cheerful thought.

I spent November working on my NaNoWriMo novel, but now that is over and I am back among the living (as opposed to the fictional). I wrote 84,000 words and got to the end of my outline, but now I have to decide what to do with those 84,000 words. I enjoy editing, but is it worth it to edit these words, or should I just stick them in a (virtual) drawer somewhere?

I've been feeling pretty gloomy since November ended. I'm missing Boulder now. If I were in Boulder I'd be shopping for a gift for the Admin gift exchange, preparing a finger food for the Boulder Bird Club holiday party, making peppermint bark for the Open House at work, and studying up on birds for the Christmas Bird Count. But here in Ridgecrest I don't seem to have anything to do. That seems silly: it's the holidays, of course I should have a project. Let's think about that. What needs to be done for the holidays?

Cards: I got busy and designed our holiday cards last night, so they'll be arriving in a week or so and then I can work on writing and addressing them. I also wrote our xmas letter, though it could use a bit of tinkering.

Gifts: I ordered Rocket Boy a shirt yesterday. We don't usually give each other a lot of stuff. The babies are supposed to be getting a toy kitchen, but the one I wanted is out of stock. I'm on a mailing list to be notified when more come in. I should think of a couple more things for them, get those ordered. My family doesn't really exchange gifts anymore...

Cooking: Later in the month I plan to make some cookies, probably just sugar cookies. I don't think the boos are ready for Date Crunch, though we do have a lot of dates in the house. RB always likes it if I make some German cookies, especially Lebkuchen. I'll think about it. (I hate Lebkuchen!)

Decorating: The only place a Christmas tree will be safe from the boo bears is on top of the grand piano, so our plan is to put up half the tree. It's a fake tree, and the trunk goes together in sections, so we'll just put together half the sections. RB and I will work on that together. Maybe in a week or two. We probably won't do much other decorating. I hung the boos' stockings on the fireplace screen and they've already knocked it down once.

Charity: I need to sit down and make a list of who we'll give money to this year and how much. We're now getting Clifford's mail and he must have given to a lot of organizations, because the number of begging letters he receives is just unreal. Lots and lots of animal charities, which are of course heartbreaking, and then some odd ones, like one we got the other day for a rehab clinic for alcoholic priests.

Church: Normally we would be going to church for Advent, but I'm just really wary of Ridgecrest churches. I did pull out my Advent wreath and lit the first candle last Sunday. That might be all we do this year.

Hanukkah: We're going to Risa's Hanukkah party on December 12, that'll be fun. I would have gotten the boo bears a book about Hanukkah at the library today, but they only had about 4 books and they were all for much older kids. It's all right: boo bears don't understand anything about Christmas either. Next year, next year.

Music: I should start playing Christmas CDs so the boos can learn the songs. We should put the new cartridge in my turntable so I can play my old records too. And finally we should clean the cat vomit out of the piano so I can play some songs.

I'm not feeling inspired.